As forced as it sounds when you read it, many of us love hearing dirty talk in the bedroom. We lose ourselves in the heat of passion and take on a persona that turns us on in the most naughty, unconventional ways. What is it about erotic communication that increases our sexual arousal?
Good sex is hard to find. Maybe it circles back to attraction. Or, maybe, it has more to do with our inhibitions around talking about what we like and want in bed with the people we like and want in bed.
Communication is at the heart of every sexual connection. One of the fundamentals of dirty talk is understanding how you like to describe your physicality to yourself and to your partners. The language of the body can be one of affirmation as well as erotic possibility.
Excuse me, Jason?! No woman wants to be thinking about pet care while having sex. Or at least not Jason Derulo alone.
Do you ever look at your partner and feel disconnected both physically and emotionally? We all know that building a connection takes time and effort. It also requires a willingness to open up and be vulnerable with each other.
YOU might not want to admit it, but sometimes we all have a little problem staying intimate in the bedroom. It might be that you are too tired or stressed about work, or you don't have enough energy even if you do want to get down and dirty. And it is easy to fall into the habit of not having regular sex, especially if you have been with your partner for a while and things aren't as hot and heavy as they used to be.
Though it may seem like garnish on the main dish, dirty talk is, for a fair number of people, an important part of satisfying sex. On a purely sensual level, whispering or screaming nasty nothings at the right moment can get everyone in a sexual encounter a little or a lot more turned on, and make them feel whatever is happening more acutely. On an almost therapeutic level, it can free one to highlight different aspects of their personalityor play with fantasies to spice things up in a long-term relationship.
Given the myriad ways it could go wrong, why even bother with dirty talk in the first place? And vice versa; voicing the desires and fantasies you usually keep to yourself to a rapt audience can be a huge turn-on. Just the sounds and tones can help us forget all about the laundry and remember just how good our partner feels. No need to channel a porn star right out of the gate.
Trying to think up something that's going to sound hot in the heat of the moment can be tough — not to mention, things can turn awkward pretty quickly if it doesn't end up coming off as sexy as it did in your head. Plus, if you and your partner haven't talked dirty to each other before, is it fine to just throw something out there? How can you ask her if it's something that she's into?